Date ?

So, I have a date tomorrow.
I'll be honest, I'm pretty nervous.
I met this guy just last weekend. 
On the one and only vampireparty in Antwerp.
He's probably the geekiest person I've ever met, and such a sweetheart.
( he's not super handsome( I will be honest about that ) but he does have an awesome sense in fashion. He couldn't look more nerdy. And the clothes make the man, right ? )
But I don't know... I've been thinking about him all day, I guess that means something.
I haven't " fallen in love " with anyone for a while now, and I guess a part of me is afraid to. 
Not trying to be sappy here, really. 
But, I live for my job, and I have so many ambitions... there are times that I think a boyfriend would only slow me down. A bit foolish I know, but it does haunt my mind from time to time.

So, I don't know what I want to happen. it's strange but I have absolutely no idea what I feel for this man, Or what I want this man to feel for me. 
I hope I'll get some answers on our date tomorrow, and that it won't be to awkward. 
I won't be able to dress up at all or anything either, since we're meeting right after work. 

Dates... they confuse and frighten me :') 
curse you need for affection.
Without you my life would be so much easier. 

Ninja

Because I have nothing interesting enough to share, have some webcam pictures of me and my awesome Ninja.

Redhead

Today I payed a visit to ' De cliënt ' in Kontich.
remember the snake pictures ?

it was a photoshoot for that hairsalon. So ofcourse if I want some magic on the top of my head, that's the first adress I go to.

I wanted to stop bleaching ( for a while ) to give my hair the chance to recover a little.
I wanted the Noctis haircolour, but they told me they'd need to bleach as well to get that done.
So, they gave me a colour I've NEVER had before, but they told me it would look amazing on me, so I didn't interfere and just allowed them to do what they're good at.

So guess what ? I'm a redhead now!
It's so weird, It doesn't look like me at all, for I've always had grey-tones in my hair! this is so...ORANGE

I love it though

Noctis hair

I've been thinking about trying out a different colour.
For some years I've been had white or silver hair, buit it's time for change!
I've always had haircolours based on final fantasy characters.
First : snowy white, was based on the one and only Baralai, Praetor of Yu Yevon ( FF X-2 )

My silver was inspired on The Yenova brothers, mainly Sephiroth ofcourse ( Final fantasy 7 )

So, first a little explanation about Noctis! He'll be the main antagonist in final fantasy versus XIII.
Us final fantasy fans have been waiting for that game for years....it was suppossed to be released together with the other games of the crystarium chronicles, but we only got XIII-2 and type -zero ! ( the last one hasn't been released in Europe yet.... )

However, the trailer has been going around for a while, and it looks pretty dark compared to the previous FF games!

However, since they're holding it back so long probably means they want to make it perfect! When FF XIII was released many were dissapointed in the new gameplay and storyline, so, they worked on that in Final fantasy XIII-2, however they still hadn't reached their full potential and I think they're trying to make it all up with final fantasy versus XIII.

Adleast, that's what I've read. I didn't mind the new gameplay or storyline in XIII, once you got used to it it actually was a lot of fun! XIII-2 on the other hand dissapointed me a little, for everyone was yelling from the rooftops it was SO much better than XIII.

So anyway, I' really like the colour of Noctis hair.
it's pretty difficult to see it clearly because of the poor youtube quality, so have some screenshots

Don't you think it would look amazing with plum lipstick? grey and black toned outfits ?
Ofcourse i'll ask my hairdresser first. I'm sure he'll be able to tell me if it's the right colour for me or not

fuck YES

So my boss just called me to tell me THE BEST NEWS EVER.
He had a word with his wife about me running the atelier when he's away, and she said it's a great idea!
This is the closest to my goal I've ever been!
Ofcourse I don't have my own atelier (yet )
but, adleast now I'll learn how it would be like!
I never thought he had so much faith in me, but it gives me such a boost!
It makes me believe more in myself as well and I guess this means I should be a lot more confident.
He knows this job better than anyone else, so if he believes in me it must be for a reason!

So, I'm really REALLY happy!
Things will change a lot starting from september.... I'll have a lot more responsibilities and there's much we'll still have to discuss before we start on it.
because up until now I've only be making jewellery, but ' running ' an atelier is something entirely different!
but FUCK YES future filled with stress and lovely jewellery HERE I COME

Chaos magic

So, someone on vampirefreaks told me about Chaos magic.
(Yes I'm back on vampirefreaks....I missed my nerdy cult <3 )
Back when I was a teenager I used to practise wicca .
My aunty bought me tarot cards once, I loved it so much. ( my aunty is a very spiritual person, she forced me to go to a medium once, told me everything I know about indigo and crystal children and has often read my future with tarot cards )
She helped me figure out my personal tarot card. Mine was ' the king '.
And when she explained what it meant I was in awe! It was SO me indeed!

But, anyway, as I got older I realized wicca isn't my thing. Only certain aspects of it I find interesting.
But than there are other forms of magic and spirituality that I find very appealing as well.
so this guy on vf told me chaos magic was the thing for me!
It's where you make your own ' rules ' based on excisting rituals, spiritualities and forms of magic.
Which forms you choose is up to you, and you can go as crazy as you want with it.
So you actually create a mixture of all forms you find fascinating.

Question is now, does it work ?
I mean.... won't some forms of magic collide with one another ? There must be some rules one must follow in order to respect every form of magic and spirituality.
Like, use sjamanisme for meditation but wicca for vision-rituals ?  But don't go mixing those two during the same ritual. Because that sounds more logical to me.

So, he told me the title of a book about Chaos magic and gave me the link to a website as well.
So, I'll definately do some research about it.

ATS accesoires

everytime when I watch those ATS videos on youtube I feel sad.
ofcourse, mainly because I'll never have their skills, no matter how much I practise.
But also because they have the most gorgeous outfits and jewellery !!!
Yes I can buy or order them but....that would be so ' unpersonal ', no ?
So all that's left is make them myself, right ?
I have been thinking about that for a while yet I always end up with the same answer " Shit Jazz no way you can make ATS accesoires, once there's fabric involved you're screwed "

Well that has always been stopping me, but, I never even TRIED.
So, I'm going to give it a try! It will be my home project!
I'll try to work on some designs tomorrow, because I'll be home to work on whatever I want!
I'll look on ebay for material, brows the web for some inspiration, and just GO for it!
Seriously it's like I'm frightened of fabric, but hey! I might actually enjoy working with that mysterious non-metal material!

I already have a slight idea in mind, for a bracelet, necklace, belt and headpiece!
I'm kinda ' afraid ' to use feathers as well... feathers have an enormous symbolic meaning in tribes.
The longer and higher the feathers reach, the higher you are in possition within the tribe.
Since I'm just an amature when it comes to ATS.... I should be using tiny, downfacing feathers or non at all :')

Yeah I know I shouldn't be paying much attention to it because " you're not really in a tribe! "
But to me it's important to stay loyal to the background of whatever I'm working on or with.
Tribes in general fascinate me so I'd feel guilty to wear high reaching feather on the top of my head like I'm the fucking queen in charge that owns ALL your asses.

So yeah I'm not sure what I'll do with the feathers part. Even though I do think feathers NEED to be in my ATS accesoires, because to me feathers have a bunch of different meanings as well.
I might just make a crazy headpiece as well, with ginormous feathers, just for fun, I'd never wear it myself though.... maybe for photoshoots? No even then I'd be scared the ancient spirits will kill me in my sleep. ... I'd love to meet them though.

I should be going to bed

seriosuly I'm going crazy. I'm excited but as in a confused way.


Or my dream might come true or I'll end up on the streets.
So one second I'm laughing and the other I'm crying, and then I'm like...
" wait that was stupid why did I cry ?  "

And yes I need Tom gifs to express my feelings because this man does it in a much hotter way than I do. I meant better...ofcourse...better way not hotter >>....

*ahum *

 

This is crazy!!

I have no idea if it's crazy in a good way or crazy in a bad way, but....I've been busy non stop and I can't seem to get a single second of rest.
I'm trying to find a new workspot, for my boss is closing down his entire atelier.
So, now I'm still working in his atelier, I'm trying to finish everything I've started on. Like my Loki pendant!
I posted it on deviantart and it's crazy how many people commented on it, begging me to make more and sell them!
Over 150 people say they're interested in buying one. I'm so happy but at the same time I'm super nervous!
I should be going from atelier to atelier, trying to find a new workspot, but one thing after another seems to be going down and I don't know what's left or right anymore!

And today I heard my boss might not close down his atelier after all, but that he might leave most of his atelier in my hands! He'll go work for another company, while' I'll stay at his atelier, accept new assignments, design for his collection,go to costumors, go shopping for material, work on a webshop, arrange photoshoots for our jewellery, Make the jewellery, ofcourse.. aso.... I was so stunned when he told me! I'm so glad I gained so much of his trust! He's willing to leave his business in my hands !

So, I'll actually have the atelier to myself! AND he wants me to start on the designs for his collection!
yes, me, designing jewellery.
God this is what I needed! this isn't just making jewellery anymore but this is the REAL DEAL.
I'll be running a friggin atelier ! ( well in a way )

They told me I could do anything but jewellery design
So I became a jewellery designer. (I need this meme ) 

Take that royal academy for fine arts

I hope I'm not over excited about this all, and that he'll blow it all off.
I'd be terribly dissapointed, oh in the name of Loki.... Please let this WORK.

ANYWAY, I'll have a price for the Loki pendant by tomorrow, my boss was going to help me figure out a good price.

The beauty....

Hypnotising....

just some talk!

So, day 7 of the lokerse feesten has started today.
it's a festival here in my hometown, it's more of a tradition than anything else really, for I never really go for the bands.
It's my dream Hurts will come to the Lokerse feesten one day XD Ofcourse there are other bands I'd love to see life but the Lokerse feesten would never invite those, sadly... because they aren't commercial enough. Hurts still fits in the boundaries the Lokerse feesten has come up with though.

I did buy an adorable ring on the festival.
It looks like an eye wearing a feathered headdress, perfect for someone like me who's got a weird fascination for eyes and loves ATS.
Talking about ATS, the classes will start again next week! I'm SO glad!
My back hurts like hell because of my work, and ATS is perfect to take care of that. plus it's just a lot of fun too, ofcourse!
There was a pendant of this ring as well and I'm thinking about buying that one as well, and more talking about ATS : I've been neglecting my costume....really, I need to make some tribal fusion bellydance accesoires. sadly I only have jewellery-crafting skills.... I'll have to think of something that's not too difficult to make, like a belt or skirt or something. maybe a headpiece ?

other than that, I'm also waiting for a call... I've ordered two triangle shaped tourmalins ( green ) for my 'stolen relic ' earrings I have in mind.
I'll probably have to wait another week though, but I just can't wait to get started on those!

Dr Naptime

So, I made a necklace for my evil minion, Dr Naptime.
some may know her as Milinda....
It took me a while to finish but I'm glad with the end result!
Everything is silver, except for the back plate, that's enamelled copper.
I also Rhodiated the silver, The black Rhodium is actually a black-coloured layer of gold.
That's why it has this grey-blackish tone all over.
Before I rhodiated the silver, I sandblasted it.
this, was to give it a satin like shine.
Once Sandblasted and Rhodiated, I polished the chains and some parts of the silver wire work.
To make it a bit more lively.
The beads are onix, for those who wonder.

Now, all that's left is to find a nice black ribbon to pull through the top, so it's ready to wear.

I won't give it to her yet though, I first need to make sure I'll find a new workingspot. they'll want to see what I've made this year so I'll need to show this as well.
She doesn't read my blog so it's save to post here. it's still a surprise, you see.

so for those who know her, don't tell! she knows I've made something for her but she has no idea just what it is.

She without a name

So, I got my mother into BJD's as well.
So I helped her to pick out a new BJD for our collection. We ended up buying this beauty. Her mold name is ' luria ', and she's a DIM doll aka ' Doll in mind '.
My mother hasn't found a name for her yet though. But when looking for pictures of france, I ran into this album. It seems my mother did a little photoshoot with her. I just love how pissed she looks, she's adorable though.

Hummingbird moth

While I was away, I went to the south of France. Where exactly I can't really tell...
It's the first time ever we travelled that far together with my disabled brother.
It was more of a test, really. We were terrified when we left for the 9 hour drive. We had no idea if he could last that long. But he has gained strength in these past few years so we realized that it was now or never.
And, it actually went perfectly well! We had such a wonderfull vacation there and my parents are so happy, they're planning on buying their own little house in france.

I'm really glad, so glad it could bring tears to my eyes really. We never dared to leave our house, and now, my mother and father are looking for a nice house in the south of france.



anyway, while I was there I was truly fascinated by the gorgeous nature that surrounded our little house.
I often just went for a walk, and stopped in the middle of nowhere to draw new character designs for my story.
It really gave me such an inspiration boost!

Also, for those that know me, will know that I just adore hummingbirds. I've always wanted to see one in the wild, but I never got the chance to.
In france there were no hummingbirds, but there were hummingbird moths! The closest one can find to a real hummingbird!
So ofcourse I stole my mother's camera and stalked the poor little creatures as soon as I found one. Aren't they gorgeous ? The colours were just amazing and they looked so fluffy !